EOLPodcast

Ep. 404 Advice for Future Corpses and Those Who Love Them with Sallie Tisdale

Learn how a Buddhist approach to death and dying can help us come to terms with our mortality.

My guest Sallie Tisdale is a nurse and the author of ten books, including Advice for Future Corpses (and Those Who Love Them.) She has worked as a registered nurse and taught at Reed College, Northwestern University, and New York University. A largely self-taught writer on health and medical issues, Tisdale has contributed to the Antioch Review, Tricycle, Harper’s Magazine, and the New Yorker. She shares what inspired her to write about death and dying and what she hopes people will take away from her book. Learn more at her website:

www.sallietisdale.com

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This episode includes:

  • How Sallie has balanced dual careers as a nurse and writer
  • Sallie’s current work as a nurse and a trainer for caregivers
  • How the Buddhist approach to death and dying has been a lens for Sallie in her work
  • The importance of bringing joy into death and dying
  • How grief can help us feel connected to everyone on the planet
  • How death is “brand new” every time we encounter it and the importance of beginner’s mind
  • Advice for people going to visit a dying person
  • Why our efforts to increase advance care planning may be failing
  • How to help people make choices about pain management and level of sedation
  • What people need to understand about hospice care at home

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest donor Kitty Edwards! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 403 Death Over Drafts: Meeting People Where They Are with Stefanie Elkins

Learn about creating opportunities in your community for conversations about death.

My guest Stefanie Elkins is a Family Caregiver Consultant, end-of-life doula, founder of Be Present Care, and the creator of Death Over Drafts, a community event held at breweries across the country to spark meaningful conversations around death and dying. She’ll share her experience bringing end-of-life conversations to community spaces where people naturally gather and how we can make a difference in someone’s end-of-life journey by helping them talk about death and grief. Learn more about Stefanie’s work at her website:

www.bepresentcare.com

Watch on YouTube

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This episode includes:

  • How Stefanie helps patients and families at the end of life
  • What inspired Death Over Drafts
  • Who attends Death Over Drafts and examples of the conversations that have taken place
  • Why conversations about death are important
  • Why we need to meet people where they are and bring death education to various venues and spaces
  • How to bring Death Over Drafts to your own community
  • Why end-of-life workers need to do their own work planning for the end of life
  • How families can support the aging and prepare for the inevitable

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest donor Phyllis Wintter and to Don Zacharias for making a Paypal donation! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 401 End-of-Life Visions and Other Experiences with Barbara Karnes RN

Learn about “non-ordinary” end-of-life experiences like deathbed visions and why they are a gift to patients and their loved ones.

This week I’m welcoming back my recurring guest Barbara Karnes RN, hospice nurse and international speaker and educator. She is also the author of the “little blue hospice book” Gone from My Sight and the recent book for caregivers, By Your Side. Barbara and I discuss common phenomena that occur during the last days of life that can be upsetting to families if they don’t understand what’s happening. As usual we share lots of stories and experiences along with our own approach to handling these situations. Learn more about Barbara’s work at her website:

www.bkbooks.com

Watch on YouTube

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This episode includes:

  • The frequency of unexplained phenomena at the end of life
  • What it’s like when a patient experiences a deathbed vision
  • The symbolic language that patients may use prior to death
  • What is terminal lucidity and how to help loved ones understand what is happening
  • How to respond to patients and caregivers when deathbed phenomena occur
  • Why it’s important to validate and normalize these experiences
  • Why we should avoid interjecting our own beliefs and interpretations about these events
  • How to help loved ones find the gift in these experiences rather than be afraid of them

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my latest patron Stefanie Elkins! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 400 The Value of Death: The Lancet Commission Report with Dr. Libby Sallnow

Learn about the important recent report from the Lancet Commission in the UK on the value of death and what each of us needs to do to help bring death back into life.

My guest Dr. Libby Sallnow is a palliative medicine consultant and honorary senior lecturer at St. Christopher’s Hospice and the UCL Marie Curie Palliative Care Research Department, UK. She is also the co-author of The Lancet Commission Report on the Value of Death: Bringing Death Back Into Life. In addition her PhD explored the translation of a model of compassionate communities from Kerala, India to London, UK. She discusses the creation of the report on The Value of Death and its key takeaways that can form a roadmap for the reform and rebalancing of death and dying in our societies. Learn more about her work at the website:

www.ucl.ac.uk/health-of-public/news-and-events/spotlight/spotlight-dr-libby-sallnow

Watch on YouTube

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • What inspired Libby’s interest in end-of-life care
  • The Lancet Commission on the Value of Death and what lead to their recent report
  • Why we need to rebalance death and dying
  • The “5 principles of a realistic utopia” as described in the report
  • Why we need to focus on death literacy first as we try to improve end-of-life care in our societies
  • The compassionate communities approach (to be covered in a future episode)

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my latest patrons Jeff Black and Lindsay Compton, and to Brittany Ellis for your donation on Paypal! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLU Blog

Blog: What Doctors Need to Learn About Death and Dying

The old man and the young woman sat across from one another stiffly perched on plastic chairs, staring down at the floor – doctor and patient. The tension in the room, exaggerated by the silence between them, was almost unbearable. Then the patient, stroking a trembling, emaciated hand across a hairless scalp, spoke haltingly, “Doctor, promise me I’m not going to die.”

According to a recent post in the New York Times by columnist Jane Brody, this type of interaction with a terminally ill patient creates occupational distress for many doctors who are not equipped emotionally to handle such a difficult situation. She states that doctors who are unable to cope with “their own feelings of frustration, failure and helplessness … may react with anger, abruptness and avoidance” toward their patients who are dying. When this occurs doctors may recommend futile treatments to patients at the end of life because they cannot connect with those patients on a human, suffering level and have nothing else to offer them.

The article touts mindfulness meditation, a practice recommended by palliative care specialist Dr. Michael Kearney, as a solution for discontent and disconnected doctors. I wholeheartedly agree that mindfulness meditation can be a very helpful practice for calming anxiety and learning to be present. However, I believe that this problem—doctors who find themselves unable to cope with perceived failure when a patient is dying—requires a deeper and more fundamental solution: doctors need a new understanding of death and therefore, life. 

These are the fundamental truths of death and dying that should be taught to every medical student from the first day of training:

1. Death is inevitable.

Every living thing on Earth will die. Death ultimately cannot be avoided or prevented, even though it can and should be forestalled when reasonably possible. The fact that every patient eventually dies creates a sense of hopelessness and futility for doctors if they pit themselves against death as an enemy—for that is a battle that can never be won. But those who recognize that the end of life is actually the final stage of human development can help their patients face their last days with dignity and make reasonable choices for their care and treatment.

2. Death is a mystery.

No matter how hard we try we simply cannot control or accurately predict when natural death will occur. In my hospice work I have seen many patients who lived far longer than expected, against all reasonable odds; and I have also seen patients who died much sooner than expected, from causes not related to their terminal illness. We have to accept this mysterious nature of death even while we work to circumvent it or prepare for its arrival.

3. Death makes life more precious.

When life is perceived against the dark backdrop of death, we can see how it shines and glistens for us, ever more precious because it is fleeting. This is the gift that our mortal nature provides us—an opportunity to cherish each moment simply for the fact that it will not last. 

4. Dying provides an opportunity for transformation.

In my work with hospice patients I have witnessed over and over the transformative power of love and forgiveness during the last days of life. When dying is respected as a natural part of life and time is allowed for the process to unfold, patients can turn their focus to matters of the heart and soul and find meaning in both life and death. But this does not happen when death is perceived as an enemy that must be resisted until the final breath is taken. Doctors can help their patients change focus by advising them with honesty when the time comes that pursuing further treatment is futile and will cause more harm than benefit.

 In my ideal world doctors would be educated in the wisdom of all aspects of health, including the decline of physical health that ends in death. Doctors would be the guides who help us make reasonable choices, who see beyond our fears, and who possess the compassion and tools to ease our suffering.  Doctors then would be the wisest members of our society, never deluded by the myth of immortality.

When a doctor such as this is asked by a patient, “How can I live, knowing I am going to die?’ the answer would be:

“You must turn your focus to those things that matter the most to you. Put your energy into living each and every moment fully rather than trying to escape death. Then when the time of your death arrives—and no one really knows when that time will be—you won’t feel bitter and deprived. You will be filled with the joy of a life of meaning—no matter how many years of life you have been given.”

Healing takes place, not when death is forestalled, but when life is embraced and affirmed in its entirety, from beginning to end. When doctors can fully understand the nature of death and dying they will become the true healers that are desperately needed in this world. 

EOLPodcast

Ep. 399 Grief Rituals and Transcending the “Five Stages” with Dr. Terri Daniel

Learn how rituals can help us with grief and what the Five Stages model gets wrong about grief.

My guest this week is Dr. Terri Daniel, inter-spiritual hospice chaplain, end-of-life educator, and grief counselor. She shares some of the powerful rituals she uses for grief at funerals and workshops and we dive into the Five Stages model and why it continues to be popular in our society. Terri is also the author of four books on death, grief and the afterlife and the founder of The Conference on Death, Grief and Belief, which focuses on how religious beliefs and cultural ideologies influence one’s relationship with death and grief. Learn more at Terri’s websites:

Watch on YouTube

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This episode includes:

  • Terri’s journey from caring for her son Danny at the end of his life to the work she is doing now
  • Why she started The Conference on Death, Grief and Belief and how to attend
  • Unique and powerful grief rituals Terri has created for people at the end of their lives and also for funerals and workshops
  • How rituals help us with grief and mourning
  • How the Five Stages model initially became applied to grief
  • What the Five Stages model gets wrong about acceptance
  • How the Five Stages model persists in our society
  • What ChatGPT says about why the Five Stages model is popular
  • Other models for personality and “love languages” that have attained widespread popularity in spite of having no evidence of accuracy (and why this happens)

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my latest patron Catherine Paton, and to Anne Jungerman for increasing your pledge, Amrita for buying me a coffee, Suzie Hopkins for your donation on Paypal, and Ray Burleigh for your donation and poem! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 397 Talking About Death with ChatGPT

Learn how the AI language model ChatGPT can be used as a resource for information about death and dying and when caution is required.

My special “guest” this week is ChatGPT an AI language model that can understand and respond to human language. Chat has been trained on a wide range of topics, including end-of-life care, hospice, palliative care, grief and bereavement, and advance care planning, among others. I conducted a written “interview” with Chat to test its knowledge and in this episode I report on my findings. In addition, I’ve compiled all of our correspondence into a book titled Conversations on Death with ChatGPT, which you can access now in ebook format. I hope you enjoy hearing about my adventures with Chat!

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • What an AI language model consists of and how to interact with it
  • The amazing depth and breadth of content and resources that ChatGPT was able to generate in a matter of seconds
  • What I learned about euphemisms for death from Chat
  • What Chat got wrong about for-profit hospice
  • How Chat needed better information about talking to children about death
  • Chat’s creative ideas for promoting advance care planning in predominantly Black communities
  • Chat’s thoughts about the 5-stages model of grief
  • A haiku Chat wrote about grief
  • How Chat helped me deal with guilt over my father’s suicide death

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patrons Susan Mackey and Colleen Bracken, and to Laura Srygley for buying me a coffee and Fabricio Vasconcelos de Lima for donating on Paypal! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 396 The Chrysalis™ Room: Transforming Death in the Nursing Home with Loretta Downs

Learn about a mission to transform care for dying patients and their loved ones in nursing homes.

My guest Loretta Downs is a Certified End-of-Life Care Practitioner and holds a Masters Degree in Gerontology. She founded Chrysalis End-of-Life Inspirations to advocate for the creation of private rooms in nursing homes and hospitals where families and friends can keep vigil with a loved one who is dying. She’ll discuss her project and share some of the stories that have inspired her work. (NOTE: This is an archived interview from the days before I acquired a professional microphone, so the sound quality is less than desired, but the content is excellent!) Learn more at Loretta’s website:

www.endoflifeinspirations.com

Listen on YouTube

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • How Loretta became interested in working with the dying
  • What is a “Chrysalis Room”
  • How Loretta conceived of the idea of a separate room for the dying in nursing homes
  • How the Chrysalis Room has benefitted both the patients and the staffs of long-term care facilities
  • What it takes to create a Chrysalis Room
  • How to advocate with a facility to change the way they care for the dying

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patrons Marian Head and Jaime Corbin, and to Lynn Mytroen for buying me a coffee! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 395 Conscious Dying, Dreamwork, and Death Doulas in Mexico with Wilka Roig

Learn about the growth of the positive death movement in Mexico and the value of conscious dying and dreamwork.

My guest Wilka Roig is a transpersonal psychologist, death doula, grief counselor, dream worker, and educator. She is the president of Fundación Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (EKR) México Centro and a doula instructor for INELDA. She discusses the growth of the doula movement in Mexico and the end-of-life issues that are currently arising in Mexico and Central and South America. In addition she talks about the dream work she engages in and the importance of symbolic dreams at the end of life. Learn more at her website:

www.wilkaroig.com

Watch on YouTube

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This episode includes:

  • How Wilka first became interested in working with death, loss and grief
  • The work of the EKR Foundation in Mexico and what programs are being offered
  • The growth of Death Café in Mexico
  • Death doula training in Mexico and how doulas are being received
  • The value of collaborating with other providers and communities to share knowledge
  • How Wilka helped start the green burial movement in Mexico
  • Why spiritual growth requires us to look at our own mortality
  • The power of the symbolism of dreams to help us heal and grow
  • Why we should be asking people at the end of life about their dreams
  • How healthcare providers could benefit from participating in a dream group

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, and to Diane for buying me 3 coffees! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 394 You’re Going to Die (YG2D): Creatively Exploring Death and Dying with Ned Buskirk

Learn how YG2D brings diverse communities in to the conversation of death and dying using creativity.

My guest Ned Buskirk is the Founder, Podcast Host, Facilitator and Executive Director for You’re Going to Die (YG2D), a 501(c)3 non-profit organization. Ned discusses the YG2D movement and how the arts are essential to helping us make meaning out of our mortality. We also talk about the importance of self-care as we try to make changes in how we think and talk about death in our society. Learn more at the website:

www.yg2d.com

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • The need that inspired the creation of the first YG2D open mic
  • How YG2D has responded to the needs of community
  • The paradox between the urgent need for the message to get out and the reality that we also need to let go and relax in the moment
  • How creative arts can be a gentle way to introduce the reality of death and dying
  • The arts are “medicine” for our mortality
  • Writing helps us access unconscious parts of ourselves that have been buried
  • We need places we can go where we are safe enough to be vulnerable
  • How listening to stories is as important as telling our own
  • Grief can be a “rite of passage” in our culture, especially if we can talk about it
  • It’s important to find the right community that can hold you in the way you need to be held
  • Why we need self-care and balance when we are working in the death and dying field
  • The prison work that Ned is engaging in through YG2D

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, and to Barbara Butler for your donation and to Laura for buying me 5 coffees! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 392 The Evolution of the American Funeral with Todd Harra

Learn the fascinating history of some funeral customs in America and how the profession is changing.

My guest Todd Harra is a 4th generation funeral director, embalmer, post-mortem reconstructionist, and creationist who works for the family funeral business in Wilmington, Delaware. He is also an author of several books including his latest book Last Rites: The Evolution of the American Funeral. He discusses the fascinating history of many funeral customs here in the U.S. and why funerals are important. Learn more at his website:

www.toddharra.com

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • What inspired Todd to work in the family business as a funeral director
  • How this career provides lessons in grace and humility
  • Common myths and stigmas about the profession of funeral director
  • How the funeral industry continues to evolve
  • How and why the practice of embalming the dead began in the U.S.
  • The history of viewing the body before burial and why it may be helpful for mourners
  • The discovery at a Neanderthal burial site of evidence for early funeral practices
  • Why funerals are important and a vital step in the grieving process
  • When and why to include children in funerals
  • How technology will change funerals in the future
  • What we need to remember about the history of funerals as we move into the future

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patron Heather Capuano! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 391 Dying in America: A Journalist’s Exploration with Ann Neumann

Learn about this journalist’s research into “the good death” and what she learned through seven years of study and travel across the U.S.

My guest Ann Neumann is a journalist whose work has appeared in The New York Times, The Guardian, Harper’s magazine, The Baffler, Guernica magazine, and elsewhere. After caring for her father at his end of life she became a hospice volunteer and began to research the meaning of a “good death” in this country, which led to her book The Good Death: An Exploration of Dying in America. She shares some of the things she learned about death as she traveled the country and listened to opinions, beliefs, and stories about what constitutes a good death. Learn more at her website:

www.annneumann.wordpress.com

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • How Ann’s experience caring for her father at the end of his life inspired her research for the book
  • How Ann and her family felt unprepared for the actual dying process even though they were receiving care from hospice
  • How the “gentle” marketing of hospice and death care services can obscure the reality of the challenges of dying
  • The tragedy of “false hope” being offered to patients rather than factual information
  • Where Ann found inspiration for each of the topics she covered in the book (e.g. medical aid in dying, pro-life movement, religious influence on dying, disability issues, prison hospice)
  • Why “dignity” can mean something different to people who live with disabilities
  • The extensive work needed to overcome racial disparities in end-of-life care and restore trust

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patron Jason P. and thank you also the anonymous person who bought me 5 coffees! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 390 Funeral Consumers Alliance: Resources for Funeral Planning with Martha Lundgren

Learn how the FCA helps consumers plan ahead for funerals and make informed choices for themselves and their loved ones.

My guest Martha Lundgren is the president of the board of Funeral Consumers Alliance of Arizona. She also serves on the speakers bureau for FCA-AZ and is a representative in the Arizona End of Life Care Partnership. Martha will tell us the role FCA plays in educating people about their rights when planning a funeral and how to avoid costly mistakes, which is information we all need to know for ourselves, loved ones, patients and clients. Learn more at the websites:

Funeral Consumers Alliance of Arizona: www.fcaaz.org

National Funeral Consumers Alliances: www.funerals.org

Watch on YouTube

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • The role of the Funeral Consumers Alliance
  • Why planning ahead is important for funerals, especially if you have specific wishes for what happens
  • How FCA helps consumers “shop around” for funeral arrangements
  • The funeral industry in general lacks transparency about pricing
  • Why you should plan in advance but not pay in advance for funerals
  • Consumers should beware of deceptive advertising in the funeral industry
  • Why it’s important to name someone to pay for and plan your funeral
  • What to do if your loved one doesn’t want a funeral
  • How to cover the cost of a funeral or disposition
  • What happens if someone dies while traveling out of state or out of the country

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patron Diana Hiatt! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 388 A Song for You: Personalized Songs for Hospice Patients with Emily Cavanagh

Learn about an initiative to provide hospice patients with songs written specifically for them about their lives and stories.

My guest Emily Cavanagh is a singer/songwriter based in New York City who performs in places like New York, Chicago and Dublin. She has made a career for herself as a singer at the intersection of music and service as she brings music to marginalized communities. She is the founder of the music initiative A Song for You, which features local, touring, and Grammy Award-winning songwriters who compose and perform original personalized songs for hospice patients and their families. She will discuss the inspiration behind A Song for You and how this work has benefitted both the recipients and the creators of these special songs. Learn more at her websites:

www.emilycavanaghmusic.com

www.hereisasongforyou.org

Watch on YouTube

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • How Emily got started in social work, activism and music
  • What inspired her to create A Song for You
  • The first song Emily wrote for a patient
  • How she writes songs for total strangers
  • How A Song for You has grown over time
  • The process for applying to have a song written for someone
  • How patients, families and songwriters have benefitted from sharing this special music
  • How to support A Song for You and its mission

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patrons Lucy Karl and Amrita Dhanji, and also to Karen Friedmann for buying me a coffee! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 385 End Well: Shifting the Culture Around End of Life with Tracy Wheeler

Learn how End Well brings together fresh and diverse perspectives on the end of life from art, design and other non-medical fields.

My guest Tracy Wheeler is the executive director of End Well, an organization dedicated to transforming how the world views end of life. Tracy has a background in art, education, culture and politics, which inform her commitment to shining a light on how we might make end of life a part of life. She discusses the mission and work of End Well since its founding and what lies ahead in the future, including the new End Well Podcast. Learn more at the website:

www.endwellproject.org

Watch on YouTube

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • Why the end-of-life movement needs to expand beyond the perspective of the healthcare industry
  • Why End Well is working with Hollywood to get more stories written about the end of life
  • How the Netflix series From Scratch portrayed very accurately a true story of serious illness and end of life
  • What the first season of the End Well Podcast consists of
  • About Dr. Shoshana Ungerleider, the founder of End Well, and what inspired her to create this organization
  • Why end-of-life care issues cannot be fixed within the medical system that helped create those very issues
  • The End Well Conference planned for 2024 and how to sign up for the mailing list
  • Why psychedelic assisted therapy will be part of the wave of the future
  • The fear of death that exists within the medical profession
  • The impact of COVID on how healthcare approaches death and dying

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patrons Michele Duncan King, Arianna Workman, and Katrina Marcuse-Sharratt! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 383 The Good News of 2022 with Karen Wyatt

Learn some of the positive developments around end-of-life issues that took place in 2022.

This is the last episode of 2022 and I’m sharing some of the best “good news” stories I’ve seen this year about progress we’ve made around care at the end of life. Every month I curate end-of-life news stories for my supporters on Patreon and I’ve made note of some encouraging developments that I present to you today. Watch this on YouTube if you’d like to see slides or enjoy listening to the audio. Meanwhile, farewell to 2022 and best wishes for a Happy New Year!

Watch on YouTube

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • The Lancet Commission on the Value of Death calls for a global paradigm shift on death and dying
  • NHPCO works to improve equity in death and dying and decrease racial disparities in care
  • Studies document inequities in end-of-life care
  • Plan to train community workers to do outreach in underserved areas
  • Recognizing the emotional and spiritual aspects of the dying process
  • Federal legislation to create a national strategy on grief and to expand advance care planning
  • Studies on caregiver stress and model for paying family caregivers
  • Best and worst places to die in the US
  • Studies on use of psychedelics to decrease anxiety at end of life
  • Virtual reality similar to psilocybin in reducing anxiety
  • “Death Tech” and media coverage of death both on the rise
  • Human composting now legal in 5 states

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu and to those who have made a donation through Paypal or bought me a coffee! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 382 Dear Death: Finding Meaning in Life and Peace in Death with Diane Button

Learn how to create a meaningful life and prepare for death with tools to help death doulas, hospice staff, and loved ones navigate the end of life.

My guest Diane Button is a founding partner of the Bay Area End-of-Life Doula Alliance in Northern California and an instructor for the University of Vermont Larner College of Medicine End-of-Life Doula Professional Certificate Program. She is also the author of Dear Death: Finding Meaning in Life, Peace in Death and Joy in an Ordinary Day and she shares insights she gathered from research she did for her masters degree and from working with hospice and doula clients over the past decade. Learn more at the website:

www.dianebutton.com

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • What led Diane to become a death doula
  • The inspiration behind Dear Death
  • The 4 pillars of a meaningful life and how Diane gathered this information
  • Why legacy projects are important and how to create one
  • What does it take to have a “good death”
  • Why Diane created The Doula’s Final Checklist
  • The “Mint Jelly” exercise for talking about death
  • Where to get Dear Death and the companion workbook

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patrons Lyn Canale and Donelle Dreese and thank you Joy for increasing your pledge! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 380 Heartwood: The Cycle of Life and Loss with Barbara Becker

Learn about a beautiful new book that explores how death teaches us, through many varied experiences of loss, how to truly live.

My guest Barbara Becker is an interfaith minister and a strategic communications consultant specializing in strengthening the voice of the non-profit community, working with the United Nations, Human Rights First, the Ms. Foundation for Women, and the Grameen Bank of Bangladesh. She is also the author of the book Heartwood: The Art of Living with the End in Mind and she shares the important lessons she has learned from death and loss throughout her life. Learn more about her work at the website:

www.barbarabecker.com

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This episode includes:

  • What inspired Barbara to become an interfaith minister and to volunteer in hospice
  • How her work in hospice informed her own feelings about death
  • What is “heartwood” and why it is a fitting title for the book
  • How Barbara turned to her own book for guidance when she faced a health crisis of her own
  • The one question we should ask ourselves to live a more purposeful life
  • What we can learn about coping with death and grief from religious traditions outside of our own
  • Advice to help family caregivers cope with caring for loved ones with Alzheimer’s
  • How to cope with the first holiday season while grieving the death of a loved one

Links mentioned in this episode:

EOLPodcast

Ep. 379 Honoring Choices: A Film to Inspire End-of-Life Planning with Elizabeth Coplan and Halle Williams

Learn about a short film that was created to encourage people to plan for and have conversations about the end of life.

In this episode I welcome two guests to discuss the short film Honoring Choices that is a powerful tool for persuading people to plan for and talk about the end of life. Elizabeth Coplan is the founder of Grief Dialogues and the creator of the stage play Honoring Choices that ultimately became the film we are featuring. Halle Williams is the marketing director for both Grief Dialogues and Honoring Choices and the co-host of Out of Grief Comes Art Podcast along with Elizabeth. Learn more about their work at the website:

www.griefdialogues.com

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This episode includes:

  • What inspired the creation of the film Honoring Choices
  • The true story behind the film
  • What Elizabeth and Halle hope the film will accomplish
  • The serious racial disparity in completing advance directives and how the film helps address this issue
  • The power of storytelling and how the film uses story to teach
  • The premiere of Honoring Choices at the Reimagine Festival in LA
  • How to use the film for teaching for hospices, hospitals, schools, churches
  • How to sponsor a screening of the film
  • Inspiration for the podcast Out of Grief Comes Art

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patron Maggie Dial! Your contribution makes all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 378 Surviving Grief with Humor with Laurie Burrows Grad

Learn how this television chef and blogger used humor to help her navigate life as a widow.

My guest Laurie Burrows Grad is a cookbook author and television chef who began blogging about grief, widowhood, and survival after the death of her husband Peter. She shares how she used humor to help her navigate life as a widow and offers some practical tips for others facing widowhood. Laurie is the author of the book The Joke’s Over, You Can Come Back Now: How this Widow Plowed Through Grief and Survived. Learn more about her work at her website:

www.lauriegrad.com

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This episode includes:

  • How Laurie felt demoted socially after the death of her husband
  • How writing blogs helped Laurie get through her grief
  • Why you have to get through the pain of grief in order to come out on the other side
  • Laurie’s experiences with grief counselors and with Our House Grief Support Center
  • How finding meaning within loss can help you feel better
  • How Laurie has used humor in her writing and throughout her grief process
  • The challenges of trying to date as a widow in later life
  • The trauma of experiencing a loved one’s death while traveling in an unfamiliar place and how the Neptune Society helped
  • Top ten things not to say to someone grieving and what to say instead
  • How cooking for others was also helpful for Laurie in her grief
  • How to get through the holidays and anniversaries by preparing in advance
  • The most important things Laurie has learned on her grief journey

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu and to those who have made a donation through Paypal or bought me a coffee! Your contributions make all the difference.