Tag: caregiving

EOLPodcast

Ep. 508 Navigating Life as a Dementia Caregiver with Beverly Thorn PhD

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Learn about a helpful book with resources for dementia caregivers.

My guest Dr. Beverly Thorn is dual trained in the neurosciences and clinical psychology. She is the author of hundreds of articles, two books, and four workbooks on coping with chronic illness. She has also been trained as an end-of-life doula and served as her husband’s caregiver through his dementia illness and at the end of his life. She is the author of the newly published book Before I Lose My Own Mind: Navigating Life as a Dementia Caregiver. Learn more at her website:

drbeverlythorn.com

Get the book here

Watch on YouTube

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • How her husband recognized that something was wrong long before his diagnosis
  • Patients and loved ones need to be empowered to change physicians if they don’t like the care they are receiving
  • The important contributions of end-of-life doulas and advocates
  • The stages of dementia Beverly observed in caring for Walt
  • Why others may not recognize significant changes that the caregiver can see
  • The constant loss and grief of dementia caregiving
  • Why an advance directive tailored for dementia is essential
  • There is a window of time where life values conversations need to be held with patients and loved ones
  • The experience of caregiver grief and guilt

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, and to everyone who bought me a coffee or donated on Paypal! Your contributions make all the difference and ensure this podcast stays ad-free.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 495 Care Boss: Strategies for Family Caregivers with Jennifer A. O’Brien

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Learn how leadership skills and organizational tools can help decrease stress for family caregivers.

My guest Jennifer O’Brien has been a practice management consultant to physicians for 35 years and is the author of the book The Hospice Doctor’s Widow, which was the subject of our previous interview. After providing care for her husband, a hospice and palliative care physician, at the end of his life she has focused on helping people start conversations about caregiving and end of life. She shares insights and tips from her latest book Care Boss: Leadership Strategies and Resources for Family Caregivers, which was inspired by her realization that there are profound similarities between leadership and family caregivers. Learn more at her website:

jenniferaobrien.com

Get the book here

Watch on YouTube

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • Similarities and differences between the roles of family caregiver and CEO
  • How leadership strategies can benefit an overwhelmed family caregiver
  • The value of having a mission and vision statement for our end of life
  • How to assemble a “team” as a caregiver by identifying the helpers
  • Tips for delegating tasks to others
  • The best time to read this book and how to use it
  • Rethinking the idea of self-care as self-management and self-awareness
  • Using the Intensity Assessment Tool to understand the degree of stress you are experiencing
  • The idea of “Precious Time” and why it’s important

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, and to everyone who has bought me a coffee or donated on Paypal! Your contributions make all the difference and ensure this podcast stays ad-free.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 493 The Good Death: An End-of-Life Guide with Suzanne B. O’Brien RN

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Learn what it means to have a “good death” and how and why we all need to prepare for the end of life to benefit ourselves, our loved ones and our planet.

My guest Suzanne B. O’Brien RN is the founder and CEO of Doulagivers Institute and a “pioneer” in the global death doula movement. She has trained hundreds of thousands of people from all around the world to care those at the end of life. Most recently Suzanne is the author of The Good Death: A Guide for Supporting Your Loved One Through the End of Life. She discusses the book and why it’s so important that we facilitate a shift in how we experience death at this time in our world. Learn more at her websites:

Doulagivers.com

TheGoodDeathBook.com

Get the book here

Watch on YouTube

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • How Suzanne first got started offering free end-of-life trainings to lay people as a hospice nurse
  • Why hospice care alone can’t fix all the problems with how we approach the end of life
  • How as a society we lost generational knowledge about caring for the sick, dying and dead at home
  • Why allowing natural death can be a better choice than aggressive life-prolonging treatment
  • Most family members lack the skills and training to care for their dying loved ones at home
  • As the physical body goes through the dying process the spiritual aspect of life becomes more apparent
  • Contemplating mortality helps us shift our mindset about death and changes how we live our lives
  • How rituals help us cope with the losses we experience in life and death

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest donor Connie WS and to John Wadsworth for renewing your pledge. Also thanks to Someone who became a monthly member of Buy Me a Coffee! Your contributions make all the difference and ensure this podcast stays ad-free.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 476 The Dying Process: What Caregivers Need to Know with Barbara Karnes RN

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Learn from an expert about the dynamics of the dying process and the most common concerns of caregivers as their loved one approaches death.

This week I’m welcoming once again my recurring guest Barbara Karnes RN who is a hospice nurse, author, thought leader and expert on end-of-life care and the dynamics of dying. She is the author of Gone from My Sight: The Dying Experience, also known in the hospice world as “the little blue book,” which remains the leading resource on the market today educating families on the signs of approaching death. She discusses the most common questions and concerns that arise for caregivers as their loved one goes through the final stages of life. Learn more about Barbara’s work and books at her website:

bkbooks.com

Get the book here

YouTube Channel

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • Stages of the natural dying process that are commonly observed
  • Fear of death can interfere with meaning at the end of life
  • How movies contribute to misunderstandings about the dying process
  • The importance of education for the general public about the signs and changes of natural dying
  • Gradual death has a process that begins 2-6 months before death
  • The first stage of dying is marked by changes in sleep, socialization and food intake which become more significant with time
  • The “labor” of dying begins 2-3 weeks before death
  • Mottling of skin is a sign of the final stage along with changes in breathing
  • Being at the bedside of someone who is dying forces us to be in the present moment
  • Why it’s difficult to predict exactly when a person will die even though we know what signs to watch for

Links mentioned in the episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my latest supporter Jim Schultz and to everyone who has bought me a coffee or made a donation through Paypal! Your contributions make all the difference and ensure this podcast stays ad-free.

EOLU Blog

How Being a Caregiver Helped Me With Grief

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By Karen Wyatt MD

As a hospice doctor I have often worked with families caring for a dying loved one at home. But I have only once had the opportunity to switch places and be the caregiver myself when my mother died. That was a profound and educational experience for me as I suddenly understood personally what it was like to be with a dying loved one around-the-clock. 

While before I had imagined what it felt like to sit up all night at the bedside holding vigil before the moment of death, I can now vividly recall the exhaustion and the uncertainty of that experience. Now I know far more than ever before what the act of being a caregiver takes and what it gives back.

I was able to let go of little moments with her one-by-one.”

The greatest blessing of being a caregiver for me was the opportunity to experience grief even before my mother had died. I was able to let go of little moments with her one-by-one: the last time she ate a spoonful of the custard she loved so much, the last morning she brushed her own hair, the last afternoon she shuffled through the kitchen with her walker, the last evening she sat on her recliner and listened to the news, the last night she touched my face and kissed me goodnight.

With the arrival of each new day, something else had been lost and the little world we were sharing became a bit smaller until we were left with only the bed she rested upon and the chair where I sat next to her. But I was able to let all of it go gradually while she was letting go of life and the pain I felt was somehow bearable.

There are other ways that the act of being a caregiver helped me:

  • Providing hands-on care and keeping my mother comfortable in her last hours gave me comfort as well. I was not just passively observing her dying process but I was helping her and it was a tremendous relief to be able to do something for her at that time.
  • I knew I was honoring her wishes by keeping her at home because she had talked with me about what she wanted at the end of life. Everything I did and every moment I spent with her felt “right” to me because I understood her preferences.
  • I was there for special moments when Mom spoke a few words or opened her eyes and smiled. Those tiny little experiences mean everything to me now as I remember our journey together to her last breaths. I am forever grateful that I didn’t miss a single moment.
  • I could give her one last gift of gratitude by enabling her to stay in her own home and have the kind of death she wanted. While there is no way to ever repay a mother for all of her years of nurturing and tender care, being there when Mom needed me was one small gesture I could make to show her my deep love.
  • We forgave one another.  Our relationship had not always been easy and there were some painful memories between us that we could never discuss. But in the middle of the night when Mom nearly fell out of bed and I was frantically trying to lift her back to safety, we connected in a moment of pure human frustration and love. Without saying a word we looked at one another and both understood somehow—life is difficult and we hurt one another along the way but nothing really shakes the deep love that resonates between our hearts. We both let go of all our resentment in that brief moment.

These opportunities were only possible because we had enlisted the aid of a home hospice team, who made regular visits and assisted me with the care that was needed. I could not have done the work without their help and I understand more than ever the important role played by hospice staffs all over the world.

I am a new person since caring for my Mom at the end of her life. I am a better doctor, a more compassionate wife, a more fun-loving mother, and a much wiser woman as I face my own aging. Life and death and grief … they are all what we make of them and how we take care of ourselves and others during the journey. I know this for sure now and the rest of my life will be blessed by that knowledge.

EOLU Blog

How I Helped My Mother Choose Hospice Care

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by Karen Wyatt MD

As a hospice physician who has cared for thousands of patients at the end of their lives, I had always assumed that hospice care would be an obvious choice for my mother when it came time for her to die. We had talked openly about my work for many years so I was not prepared for the fear and resistance that came up for her when it was time to choose the next steps in her medical care.

I soon learned that while Mom thought hospice care was wonderful and a blessing for other people, she was not prepared to accept it for herself. As we talked together I learned that she had many of the same misunderstandings about hospice care that I had heard from patients and their families in my work. Before she could agree to become a hospice patient we needed to address each of Mom’s concerns and misperceptions:

  • Does hospice mean “going without” medical care?

    Mom feared that she would no longer be under the care of a doctor or be receiving attention for her medical problems. I helped her understand that hospice provides excellent care through a team approach that includes a doctor, nurse, aide, chaplain, social worker, and volunteers. Not only would all of her medical needs still be looked after, but she would actually be receiving the best possible care that focuses on the whole person, rather than just the disease.

    • Does hospice mean “giving up” on life?

    Many people, including my Mom, have the misunderstanding that hospice should only be chosen when you no longer care about life. But in fact, I explained to Mom, patients who do choose hospice are able to enjoy life more fully because their time and energy is no longer consumed with difficult treatments and uncomfortable side effects. With the excellent symptom management provided by the hospice team, patients are able to spend time with their loved ones and enjoy special moments, such as these my patients have experienced: having a picnic in the park, watching a play, attending a birthday party, or going fishing.

    • Does hospice mean going to an “old folks home”?

    Mom feared that if she chose hospice she might end up being admitted to a “home,” where she would be neglected or abandoned. I reassured her that hospice care would be provided in her own home by an attentive staff. She could be comfortable in her own surroundings with me and other family members looking after her with the help of the hospice workers. Those patients who need to be admitted to an inpatient facility still receive the same level of compassionate care that is provided in the home and can have loved ones at the bedside throughout their stay.

    • Does hospice mean being cared for by strangers?

    Mom quickly learned during our introductory meeting with the hospice nurse that the healthcare workers who are attracted to hospice work are very special people. She immediately bonded with the nurse and recognized that she would be receiving not only competent care, but also compassionate, loving care. Her fears of being neglected or mistreated vanished when she saw that during her home visits she was free to ask questions and express her wishes.

    • Do hospice patients die more quickly?

    Mom was concerned that choosing to move from curative treatment to supportive hospice care would shorten her life. But I was able to reassure her with statistics showing that hospice patients actually live longer than patients with the same diagnosis who do not receive hospice care. In my experience many patients lived more days than expected and also reported greater quality of life during those days. 

    By listening to Mom’s fears and providing her with factual information about hospice care I was able to help her choose to be admitted to a home hospice. She bonded with the staff quickly and looked forward to every visit. She set aside special books to give to her nurse that she thought she might enjoy reading and considered her a friend. 

    Mom’s last weeks of life were filled with laughter and love as she spent them in her home surrounded by the people and things she cherished. Hospice made it possible for her to stay in her home and offered support to me as her caregiver. We navigated her last days together, mother and daughter, and discovered our own special moments of healing and forgiveness that might not have been possible in a different setting. 

    During one of her last lucid days Mom, with tears in her eyes, expressed her thankfulness that she had chosen hospice because “this has all been wonderful.” She wouldn’t have had it be any other way. She wanted everyone to know that hospice eases fear and offers hope and love, which is the perfect way to spend your last moments of life.

    EOLU Blog

    Preserving My Mother’s Dignity at the End of Her Life

    kwyattmd

    by Karen Wyatt MD

    When my mother reached the end of her life she had only two requests: that she be able to die in her own home and that I be by her side. But I knew as well that it would be very important for her to retain her dignity, even as her physical health was declining. Mom had always been a beautiful woman and took pride in how she dressed and presented herself to the world. So I realized it would be important to her to feel she was at her best even in the worst of situations. 

    In my research as a hospice doctor about providing the best quality care to patients I learned that the word dignity comes from the Latin word dignitas, meaning worth or value. I understood that one of the keys to preserving Mom’s dignity would be to make sure she always felt valued and worthy of the greatest love possible as she was dying. But how could I accomplish that?

    According to studies done by Dr. Harvey Max Chochinov,[1] dignity at the end of life can be undermined by inadequately treated pain, lack of support both from family and from professionals, depression or hopelessness, increased dependency, and lack of quality of life. So using those guidelines I set out to make sure that Mom would not question her own value or worth as she was dying. Here are some of the steps I took:

    • Enlist the help of a local hospice.

    The hospice we worked with provided a nurse who made home visits to assess Mom’s pain and other symptoms and then brought us the medications and medical equipment needed to keep her comfortable. Hospice also provided a home health aide who helped Mom bathe and change her clothes and bed linens when needed. So with the help of hospice Mom had reliable professional support and care for her pain and dependency needs.

    • Maintain her self-care rituals.

    For as long as I could remember Mom had always had a nightly ritual of applying various cleansers and creams to her face, neck and eyes before she went to sleep. When she could no longer get out of bed I brought in a tray of her facial creams and helped her apply them, just as she had done every night in the past. This simple gesture helped her see that she was still the same person she had always been and that she still mattered. 

    • Invite family and friends to visit.

    A few days before Mom died I set aside some time when her closest friends and family members could stop by for a final brief visit. I fixed her hair, dressed her in her best robe and straightened up her bedroom so that she would feel comfortable having guests come in. She beamed brightly that day at the outpouring of love for her and had the chance to deliver her own messages of love to special people. She knew without a doubt that she was cherished.

    • Support her spiritual preferences.

    Mom had always been deeply religious but in the last few days of her life she began to wonder why God was still keeping her alive when she was so ready to die. She told me many stories of her prayers for other people and miracles that she had witnessed and I helped her to see that perhaps she was still alive because there were still people who needed her prayers. This thought gave her great comfort and she decided to pray for blessings for the hospice workers who had been caring for her. She went to sleep on her last night of life recognizing that she had a valuable role to play even as she was dying.

    Preserving my mother’s dignity in the last days of her life was the least I could do for her after the care she had given to me throughout my life. I learned that when we slow down, take time to listen and be present with our loved ones, they will tell us what they need in order to feel valued and worthy of our love. In the days and months following her death my own grief was easier to bear because I knew Mom had died in peace and love and with her dignity still   intact.

    [1] Chochinov HM, Hack T, Hassard T, Kristjanson LJ, McClement S, Harlos M.

    Lancet. 2002 Dec 21-28;360(9350):2026-30

    EOLPodcast

    Ep. 449 Open to Love: Senior Dating After Loss and Grief with Drs. Gloria Horsley and Frank Powers

    kwyattmd

    Learn about an informative and inspirational book to help seniors find love in their lives after experiencing loss through death or divorce.

    My special guests this week, Drs. Gloria Horsley and Frank Powers, are a senior couple who met later in life, after experiencing loss. Gloria is a marriage and family therapist and Frank is a psychologist so between them they possess a lot of knowledge about grief, loss and relationships, including the deadly impact of loneliness on seniors in our society. Together they’ve written the book Open to Love: The Secrets of Senior Dating, which springs from their own experience of meeting and falling in love through a senior dating app. They share their tips and suggestions for seniors looking for love and facing the challenge of dating after a long-term relationship. Learn more at their websites:

    opentohope.com

    goldendatingdoctors.com

    Get the book

    YouTube Channel

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • The value of senior dating for alleviating loneliness and isolation in later life
    • What seniors need to know about the current dating world
    • Tips for trying an online dating app for the first time
    • The most important qualities to look for in a later life partner
    • Advice for later life partners whose children are not supportive of their new relationship
    • How seniors in a new relationship might discuss difficult issues such as finances, caregiving expectations and end-of-life preparations
    • What senior couples should consider before deciding whether or not to marry

    Links mentioned in this episode:

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, and thank you to Leslie for buying me a coffee and everyone who has joined the $10 for 10 Years Campaign! Your contributions make all the difference and ensure this podcast stays ad-free.

    EOLPodcast

    Ep. 428 Love and Loss as a Caregiver Dealing with Lewy Body Dementia with Mary Lou Falcone

    kwyattmd

    Learn about Lewy Body Dementia, why it is difficult to diagnose, and the special challenges faced by caregivers.

    My guest Mary Lou Falcone has been an advocate for Lewy body dementia awareness since her dear husband Nicky Zann died of the disease in 2020. Mary Lou is internationally known as a classical music publicist who has guided the careers of many celebrated artists such as Van Cliburn, Renée Fleming, and James Taylor. Her communication and strategy skills make her well-suited to be an ambassador for LBD awareness and she is committed to sharing her experience and factual information about LBD with the public. She is the author of the newly published book I Didn’t See it Coming: Scenes of Love, Loss, and Lewy Body Dementia. Learn more at her website:

    www.maryloufalcone.com

    Get the book here

    Watch on YouTube

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • Why Mary Lou decided to become a crusader for LBD awareness
    • The difference between Alzheimer’s and Lewy Body Dementia
    • The symptoms of LBD and why it is often difficult to diagnose
    • The inspiration for writing this book
    • Why LBD is little known by the general population
    • How to cope as a caregiver with the fluctuating symptoms of LBD
    • Survival strategies for LBD caregivers
    • Helpful resources available for caregivers

    Links mentioned in this episode:

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest donors Trina Wacasey and Samantha Potter and to Dianne Feltham for increasing your pledge.  Also thank you to Anonymous for buying me 3 coffees and to Carol Soppe and Samantha Potter for joining the $10 for 10 Years Campaign! Your contributions make all the difference and ensure this podcast stays ad-free.

    EOLPodcast

    Ep. 420 Providing Comfort During the Last Days of Life with Barbara Karnes RN

    kwyattmd

    Learn useful tips for helping patients and loved ones be more comfortable at the very end of life – small changes can make a big difference.

    This week I welcome back my recurring guest Barbara Karnes RN, hospice nurse, author, speaker, thought leader and expert on end-of-life care. She is the author of ‘the little blue hospice book,” Gone from My Sight and the recently published By Your Side: A Guide for Caring for the Dying at Home. We discuss tips for caregivers to provide comfort to patients during the last days and hours of life when they may not be able to communicate their needs. There are dozens of “little things” that can make a big difference in the comfort level of our loved ones and patients and you’ll learn about them in this conversation. Learn more about Barbara’s work and books at her website:

    www.bkbooks.com

    Watch on YouTube

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • Why grooming and hygiene matter for patients all the way through the end of life
    • Tips for good mouth and lip care
    • Preserving patient dignity by honoring their routines
    • Preventing skin breakdown
    • Importance of positioning and turning patients for maximum comfort
    • Dealing with breathing issues and “death rattle”
    • An alternative to adult diapers
    • Options for administering medications sublingually, rectally or as a skin cream

    Links mentioned in this episode:

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest donor Michelle Sandner and to  Amrita for buying me a coffee! Also many thanks to all of you who joined the $10 for 10 Years Campaign! Your contributions make all the difference and ensure this podcast stays ad-free.

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    Ep. 419 Humane Prison Hospice Project with Lisa Deal RN and Fernando Murillo

    kwyattmd

    Learn about a remarkable program that trains incarcerated people in palliative and hospice care skills so they can provide care for their peers in correctional facilities.

    My two special guests this week work with the Humane Prison Hospice Project: Lisa Deal is the Executive Director, who previously worked for Mission Hospice and Home Care in California. Fernando Murillo is the Program Manager for the Palliative Care Initiative at the Humane Prison Hospice Project where he trains incarcerated people to provide palliative and hospice care for their aging and dying peers. Fernando shares the story of committing himself to improving the overall quality of life in the correctional setting during his own 24 years of incarceration. Together we discuss the need for hospice and palliative care in prisons and how this project is meeting that need and hoping to expand in the future. Learn more at the website:

    www.humaneprisonhospiceproject.org

    Watch on YouTube

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • How the Humane Prison Hospice Project got started
    • How Lisa became interested in the idea of prison hospice
    • Fernando’s journey from incarceration to now providing training in palliative and hospice care skills to others who are incarcerated
    • Why palliative and hospice care is desperately needed right now in prisons in the U.S.
    • How incarcerated people benefit from receiving training to become caregivers for their fellow residents
    • How the entire prison, including staff, benefits from the presence of the Humane Prison Hospice Project
    • How to get similar projects started in other prisons across the country
    • What hospice workers need to know before volunteering to teach in a correctional setting

    Links mentioned in this episode:

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest donors Cathy Duke, Laurie Kurs, and Kelly Oberle! Also many thanks to all of you who joined the $10 for 10 Years Campaign! Your contributions make all the difference and ensure this podcast stays ad-free.

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    Ep. 383 The Good News of 2022 with Karen Wyatt

    kwyattmd

    Learn some of the positive developments around end-of-life issues that took place in 2022.

    This is the last episode of 2022 and I’m sharing some of the best “good news” stories I’ve seen this year about progress we’ve made around care at the end of life. Every month I curate end-of-life news stories for my supporters on Patreon and I’ve made note of some encouraging developments that I present to you today. Watch this on YouTube if you’d like to see slides or enjoy listening to the audio. Meanwhile, farewell to 2022 and best wishes for a Happy New Year!

    Watch on YouTube

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • The Lancet Commission on the Value of Death calls for a global paradigm shift on death and dying
    • NHPCO works to improve equity in death and dying and decrease racial disparities in care
    • Studies document inequities in end-of-life care
    • Plan to train community workers to do outreach in underserved areas
    • Recognizing the emotional and spiritual aspects of the dying process
    • Federal legislation to create a national strategy on grief and to expand advance care planning
    • Studies on caregiver stress and model for paying family caregivers
    • Best and worst places to die in the US
    • Studies on use of psychedelics to decrease anxiety at end of life
    • Virtual reality similar to psilocybin in reducing anxiety
    • “Death Tech” and media coverage of death both on the rise
    • Human composting now legal in 5 states

    Links mentioned in this episode:

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu and to those who have made a donation through Paypal or bought me a coffee! Your contributions make all the difference.

    EOLPodcast

    Ep. 369 Practical Tools for Home Caregivers with Barbara Karnes RN

    kwyattmd

    Learn useful tips for caring for a dying loved one at home and how to be better prepared for the challenge.

    My special return guest is Barbara Karnes RN, hospice nurse, author, thought leader, and expert on end-of-life care. Barbara is going to be a recurring guest from now on, joining the podcast every other month to talk about hospice care. Today we discuss practical tools that caregivers need in order to care for themselves and their loved ones at the end of life. Barbara has written a new guide for caregivers called By Your Side that offers a tremendous number of resources and practical tips and she’ll share many of them with us today. Learn more about Barbara’s work at her website:

    www.bkbooks.com

    Get By Your Side here

    Watch on YouTube

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • The needs of caregivers are often overlooked by both hospital and hospice staffs
    • What caregivers need to know about food intake for patients at the end of life
    • The importance of keeping a written record of patient’s status throughout the day because it’s too hard to remember
    • The impact of sleep deprivation and fatigue on caregivers including lack of patience and flexibility
    • Why self-care for caregivers is essential and not selfish
    • How to set boundaries with a patient and why they are necessary
    • It’s not a failure to decide that home caregiving is too difficult
    • Why understanding the dying process is important for caregivers
    • How to find support in your community as a caregiver
    • How care of patients with dementia differs from other hospice patients
    • Basic information about pain management and symptom control

    Links mentioned in this episode:

    Buy me a coffee

    Donate on Paypal

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patron Donna Fleming, and to those who have bought me a coffee and made a donation through Paypal! Your contributions make all the difference.

    EOLPodcast

    Ep. 349 Why My Family Chose Hospice with Kathleen Vallee Stein

    kwyattmd

    Learn about the hospice experience from the perspective of a family member.

    My guest Kathleen Vallee Stein worked for the California Department of Aging and has written numerous articles on caring for aging patents for more than twenty years. Her work has been published in the Christian Science Monitor, Los Angeles Times, Los Angeles Daily News, Pasadena Star-News, Orange County Register, and the Jewish Journal. Recently she has written a book about her family’s experiences as her father faced the end of life called Loving Choices, Peaceful Passing: Why My Family Chose Hospice, and today she’ll share insights from that hospice journey with her father. Learn more at her website:

    www.valleeview.com

    Get the book here

    Read the transcript

    Watch on YouTube

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • How her family made the decision to choose hospice for her father
    • The challenges of having conversations about hospice with a loved one at the end of life
    • How the family had to bring up hospice with the doctor initially but he was helpful after that point
    • The relief experienced by the entire family and the patient once they made the decision to stop curative treatment and to enroll in hospice
    • Negative misperceptions about hospice are an obstacle to early admission
    • How her father’s temperament changed for the better after going on hospice
    • Why Kathleen hired in-home professional caregivers even though her parents were initially opposed to it
    • How they managed their parents’ financial issues as a family
    • Dealing with old family conflicts that arise at the end of life
    • How the hospice chaplain made a big difference for her father
    • The many positive surprises that arose during her father’s end of life
    • How they planned the funeral and made decisions about disposition
    • How she and her mother grew closer through the challenges of caring for her father at the end of life
    • Advice to those considering hospice for a loved one
    • Hope and “precious time” with her father in his last days

    Links mentioned in this episode:

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu! Your contributions make all the difference.

    EOLPodcast

    Ep. 347 The Global Palliative Care Movement with Katherine Pettus

    kwyattmd

    Learn about the status of palliative care in developing nations around the world and how IAHPC is working to increase global access.

    My guest Katherine Pettus is the Senior Advocacy Director for The International Association for Hospice and Palliative Care. In this role she meets with delegates at the United Nations to increase the understanding of palliative care and to advocate for improved availability of opioids for patients needing pain relief. She is the author of Global Palliative Care: Reports from the Peripheries, which describes her visits to communities around the world to witness firsthand their utilization of palliative care. Learn more about the work of IAHPC at the website:

    www.hospicecare.com

    Read the transcript

    Watch on YouTube

    Get the book

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • Why 80% of the world’s population has no access to morphine
    • How Hospice Africa Uganda is utilizing powdered morphine for pain relief and also allows nurses to prescribe it in the field
    • Why palliative care teams are good at “sideways thinking” to solve problems that arrive in the moment
    • How caregiving is a crisis everywhere in the world right now (except Costa Rica that provides support for family caregivers)
    • Why the extended family is becoming a myth in developing nations
    • What is the “health poverty trap” and how lack of access to palliative care contributes to it
    • How the Western model of medicalized death is spreading to developing nations
    • Expanding palliative care helps medical systems and medical providers as well
    • How a “palliative care peace corps” could transform society
    • How COVID has affected the global palliative care movement

    Palliative Care transforms everyone who participates in it.” 

    Katherine Pettus in Global Palliative Care: Reports from the Peripheries

    Links mentioned in this episode:

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu! Your contributions make all the difference.

    EOLPodcast

    Ep. 344 Tools for Caregivers to Manage Stress and Increase Joy with Roger Moore

    kwyattmd

    Learn some quick and easy stress management tools to improve health and joy during challenging times.

    My guest Roger Moore is a certified hypnotherapist who helps people at the end of life with anxiety, depression, pain and other symptoms. His latest book Becoming the Greatest Expression of You contains tips and practices for overcoming the shame and fear of the past to live life more joyfully now. He discusses how these stress-reducing practices might help caregivers stay healthier as they offer care and support to their loved ones. These suggestions are also perfect for all of us as we navigate the stresses of life. Learn more at Roger’s websites:

    www.palmdeserthypnosis.com

    Get the book here

    Read the transcript

    Watch on YouTube

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • How we can rewire the brain even until the moment we die
    • How to experience joy even during times of pain and difficulty
    • When we are able to recognize the presence of stress in our bodies we can more easily shift out of it into a state of joy
    • How laughter can change an entire day
    • Using a practice of “mental rehearsal” to envision things going well instead of badly
    • How caregivers can learn to ask for help from others
    • Simple tips for using meditation to help with stress
    • The importance of practicing gratitude every day
    • How to use self-forgiveness to move past blame and shame when things go wrong

    Links mentioned in this episode:

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu! Your contributions make all the difference.

    EOLPodcast

    Ep. 340 Caregiver Crisis: Meeting the Needs of the Future with Jessica Zitter MD

    kwyattmd

    Learn about the current crisis in family caregiving and what you can do to help.

    My guest Dr. Jessica Zitter is a specialist in Critical Care and Palliative Care medicine and the author of the book Extreme Measures: Finding a Better Path to the End of Life. Her work is featured in the documentary Extremis as well as her new film, Caregiver: A Love Story. Today she discusses the current crisis situation for family caregivers who are drastically overworked with little support. This is one of the most important topics we can address for the future! Learn more at these websites:

    www.jessicazitter.com

    www.caregiveralovestory.com

    Read the transcript here. Watch video on YouTube

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • What inspired Jessica to create Caregiver: A Love Story
    • How film is a compelling medium for encouraging people to change their behavior
    • How medical providers are often unaware of the stresses facing family caregivers
    • More people are now dying at home than in the hospital which means there is huge need for caregivers
    • 1 out of 5 Americans is caring for a loved one at home
    • The burden experienced by caregivers is physical, mental and financial
    • We need a workplace culture that supports caregivers
    • Family caregivers are providing billions of dollars of unpaid work for an average of 4.5 years
    • Hospitals and doctors are doing a poor job of preparing caregivers for the tasks they will face – The Care Act requires them to provide education (but it’s not happening)
    • Hospice staffs are also burdened by the caregiver crisis
    • We also need to build up and support professional paid caregivers

    Links mentioned in this episode:

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu! Your contributions make all the difference.

    EOLPodcast

    Ep. 339 Feng Shui for Hospice Patients with Char Tarashanti

    kwyattmd

    Learn how paying attention to the small details of the surroundings can make a big difference in the wellbeing of hospice patients.

    My guest Char Tarashanti is a retired Hospice Chaplain and Certified Feng Shui Consultant. She shares how the principles of Feng Shui can be applied to the care of hospice patients and improve the physical environment as well as the harmony and balance of the space. Her practical suggestions make it simple for any of us to create more pleasing and appealing surroundings for people at the end of life. Download her handout here:

    Handout

    Read Transcript

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • What is Feng Shui
    • How death is viewed within the Feng Shui tradition
    • How Char became interested in Feng Shui and in hospice work
    • The benefits for patient and caregiver of creating a more harmonious space
    • The essential elements of Feng Shui and how to apply them to a hospice room
    • How to manage clutter and get better organized in a home hospice setting
    • The two most important features of Feng Shui for hospice patients
    • How caregivers should communicate about any changes being made in the home before beginning the process

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my new patrons Aby Fy and Anne Janssen and to Richard Schneider for increasing your monthly pledge! Your contributions make all the difference.

    EOLPodcast

    Ep. 337 The Hospice Doctor’s Widow: A Caregiver’s Journal with Jennifer O’Brien

    kwyattmd

    Learn about a beautiful, artistic journal that explores the caregiver’s journey through dying and grief.

    My guest this week is Jennifer O’Brien, author of the creative, gorgeous journal: The Hospice Doctor’s Widow. She discusses her journey as she cared for her husband who was a hospice and palliative care physician diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. We talk about grief and loss and caregiving in this intimate conversation. Learn more at her website:

    www.hospicedrswidow.com

    Get the book here

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • Why this book is ideal for caregivers and people dealing with grief
    • How Jennifer created the art for the book
    • How Jennifer incorporated her husband’s wisdom into the book
    • What is “Precious Time” and how did that inform the way she and Bob spent his last days of life together
    • Navigating anticipatory grief for caregivers
    • Why the patient and the caregiver are going through two different processes
    • Why the survivors’ journey can be more difficult than the patient’s journey
    • What is the Triad of Certainty
    • Advice for caregivers
    • The At Peace Toolkit – A Guide to Being at Peace with End of Life

    ‘Precious Time’ is when you say what you need to say and don’t say what you will later regret.”

    from The Hospice Doctor’s Widow by Jennifer O’Brien
    • A Year of Reading Dangerously – Register here
    • Get the At Peace Toolkit from Jennifer here

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my new patrons G. Thackrey and Mary Susan Graham! Your contributions make all the difference.

    EOLPodcast

    Ep. 293 When Your Aging Parent Needs Help: A Step by Step Guide with Leslie Kernisan MD

    kwyattmd

    Learn about a helpful guidebook for people caring for elderly parents that addresses all the major challenges.

    My guest Dr. Leslie Kernisan is a practicing geriatrician and the founder of the popular aging health website and podcast Better Health While Aging. She recently published the book When Your Aging Parent Needs Help to answer the many questions she has received from people struggling to care for their elderly parents. She shares many of the helpful tools and resources included in the book for dealing with our most pressing issues when we become involved in providing care to our older loved ones. Learn more at her website:

    www.betterhealthwhileaging.net

    Get the book here

    Listen here:

    This episode includes:

    • Why good communication skills are important in caring for our parents
    • How to approach a challenging subject (e.g. the COVID vaccine) with reluctant elders
    • Remembering to respect what matters to our elders (your goals vs your parents’ goals)
    • What to say when the conversation hasn’t gone well
    • How to negotiate doctor visits with your parents: what to bring, what to ask
    • Self-care tips for caregivers feeling the strain of dealing with parents
    • When to let go and accept things as they are instead of trying to be perfect caregivers
    • What to do if parents become paranoid and blame you for things
    • Steps and tips to slow brain health decline due to Alzheimer’s

    Links mentioned in this episode:

    If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes! Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu! Your contributions make all the difference!