Tag: funeral planning

EOLPodcast

Ep. 392 The Evolution of the American Funeral with Todd Harra

kwyattmd

Learn the fascinating history of some funeral customs in America and how the profession is changing.

My guest Todd Harra is a 4th generation funeral director, embalmer, post-mortem reconstructionist, and creationist who works for the family funeral business in Wilmington, Delaware. He is also an author of several books including his latest book Last Rites: The Evolution of the American Funeral. He discusses the fascinating history of many funeral customs here in the U.S. and why funerals are important. Learn more at his website:

www.toddharra.com

Get the book here

Watch on YouTube

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • What inspired Todd to work in the family business as a funeral director
  • How this career provides lessons in grace and humility
  • Common myths and stigmas about the profession of funeral director
  • How the funeral industry continues to evolve
  • How and why the practice of embalming the dead began in the U.S.
  • The history of viewing the body before burial and why it may be helpful for mourners
  • The discovery at a Neanderthal burial site of evidence for early funeral practices
  • Why funerals are important and a vital step in the grieving process
  • When and why to include children in funerals
  • How technology will change funerals in the future
  • What we need to remember about the history of funerals as we move into the future

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patron Heather Capuano! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 390 Funeral Consumers Alliance: Resources for Funeral Planning with Martha Lundgren

kwyattmd

Learn how the FCA helps consumers plan ahead for funerals and make informed choices for themselves and their loved ones.

My guest Martha Lundgren is the president of the board of Funeral Consumers Alliance of Arizona. She also serves on the speakers bureau for FCA-AZ and is a representative in the Arizona End of Life Care Partnership. Martha will tell us the role FCA plays in educating people about their rights when planning a funeral and how to avoid costly mistakes, which is information we all need to know for ourselves, loved ones, patients and clients. Learn more at the websites:

Funeral Consumers Alliance of Arizona: www.fcaaz.org

National Funeral Consumers Alliances: www.funerals.org

Watch on YouTube

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • The role of the Funeral Consumers Alliance
  • Why planning ahead is important for funerals, especially if you have specific wishes for what happens
  • How FCA helps consumers “shop around” for funeral arrangements
  • The funeral industry in general lacks transparency about pricing
  • Why you should plan in advance but not pay in advance for funerals
  • Consumers should beware of deceptive advertising in the funeral industry
  • Why it’s important to name someone to pay for and plan your funeral
  • What to do if your loved one doesn’t want a funeral
  • How to cover the cost of a funeral or disposition
  • What happens if someone dies while traveling out of state or out of the country

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest patron Diana Hiatt! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 336 Better Place Forests: Reimagining Cemeteries with Sandy Gibson

kwyattmd

Learn why forests are the cemeteries of the future.

My guest Sandy Gibson is the co-founder and CEO of Better Place Forests, a sustainable alternative to traditional cemeteries for families who choose cremation. Sandy founded several companies and worked in finance and software before founding Better Place Forests. He shares how experiencing significant loss early in his life helped inspire him decide to reimagine cemeteries and make them good for the entire world. You’ll learn how you can find “your tree” and plan ahead for a sustainable, earth-friendly disposition after you die. Learn more about Better Place Forests at the website:

www.betterplaceforests.com

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • How the idea for Better Place Forests came about.
  • Why it is important to reimagine cemeteries right now.
  • How Better Place Forests are intended to be places for families and communities to come together.
  • How the service works for those “at need” or those choosing a tree in advance.
  • What a “spreading ceremony” consists of
  • The importance of rituals at the end of life
  • Where Better Place Forests are located and may expand in the future
  • How Better Place is planting trees to offset the carbon footprint of fire cremation
  • Advice for people experiencing loss and grief at this time

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my new patrons Louise O’Brien and Daraleen C. Shales! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 334 Terramation: A Green Option for Death Care with Micah Truman and Brie Smith

kwyattmd

Learn about an exciting environmentally friendly option for disposition after death.

My guests today are Micah Truman, the CEO and Founder of Return Home.com, and Brie Smith who is the Services Director for the company. Return Home is designed to ensure a sustainable future for the planet by using terramation, an environmentally friendly option for disposition after death. They discuss the process of terramation (a form of human composting) and how it is available right now to people from all 50 states at Return Home. You can learn more at their website:

www.returnhome.com

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • How the inspiration for Return Home came about
  • What is terramation and how it works
  • The benefits of terramation over fire cremation or natural burial
  • How Return Home is able to service clients from other states (outside of Washington state)
  • What is possible for funerals and memorial services at Return Home
  • The end product of terramation and what can be done with it
  • What EOL educators should teach their clients about terramation and where to find resources
  • How one can make plans in advance to utilize the services of Return Home

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my new patron fotoguyz! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 320 Disrupting the Casket Industry: Titan Casket Online with Scott Ginsberg, Liz Siegel, and Josh Siegel

kwyattmd

Learn about an online marketplace for caskets that is a game-changer for the funeral industry.

My three guests–Scott Ginsberg, Liz Siegel, and Josh Siegel–are the co-founders of Titan Casket, an online marketplace that sells caskets directly to consumers. The mission of Titan Casket is “to offer designer caskets at revolutionary prices, while driving affordability and transparency in the funeral industry.” Today they’ll share why the casket and funeral industries are in need of disruption and how their online service works for consumers. We’ll talk about technology in general and how it is currently changing every aspect of end-of-life planning. Learn more at their website:

www.titancasket.com

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • What inspired the creation of Titan Casket
  • Why now is the right time for a disruption in the funeral industry
  • How their online marketplace works for consumers
  • The “Funeral Rule” and consumer rights in funeral planning
  • How Titan Casket can actually benefit funeral directors
  • How an “on-demand” casket company can meet the unique and creative needs of consumers with a rapid turn-around time
  • Why death doulas, home funeral guides and alternative funeral directors should know about Titan Casket and their eco-friendly caskets
  • How technology is impacting other areas of end-of-life care

Links mentioned in this episode:

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest supporters Kelly Bean, Leslie Alin-Tewes, Karen Friedman and Kyle Tevlin! Your contributions make all the difference.

EOLPodcast

Ep. 317 It’s Your Funeral! A “Fun” Guide to Planning for the End with Kathy Benjamin

kwyattmd

Learn about a helpful and humorous workbook for funeral planning.

My guest Kathy Benjamin is a freelance writer whose work has appeared on various sites including Uproxx, Playboy’s The Smoking Jacket, and Cracked.com. She is the author Funerals to Die For and the recently released It’s Your Funeral: Plan the Celebration of a Lifetime Before it’s Too Late. She shares how she got interested in writing about funerals and some of the fascinating facts she’s learned over time about the importance of funerals throughout history and across all societies. We also discuss her set-by-step guide to creating a great funeral. Connect with Kathy at her website:

www.KathyBenjamin.com

Get It’s Your Funeral here.

Listen here:

This episode includes:

  • How Kathy got inspired to write two books about funerals
  • How she did research for the topics in the book
  • Why funerals are important and how it helps to plan one in advance
  • Some of the components of a good funeral to consider in your planning:
    • Venue
    • Funeral roles
    • Theme
    • Eulogy
    • Burial options
  • Interesting funeral traditions from around the world
  • Challenges for funeral planning during the pandemic
  • Why It’s Your Funeral could be a good humorous gift for a milestone birthday
  • How to use the book to get started on planning your funeral now

Links mentioned in this episode:

  • Follow Kathy on social media:
    • Facebook: facebook.com/kab18
    • Twitter: @KathyBenjamin

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu! Your contributions make all the difference.

End of Life, EOLPodcast

Ep. 245 Virtual Funerals and Memorials: Innovation for Now and the Future with Noha Waibsnaider

kwyattmd

Learn how online platforms are helping families gather for funerals and memorials during this time of isolation due to COVID-19.

My guest Noha Waibsnaider is the co-founder and CEO of GatheringUs, an online platform where communities can gather after the death of a loved one and create a memorial page or schedule an event. Her team helps people create customized ceremonies and gatherings to honor their loved ones and share comfort and support. After a very successful first year of business, Gathering Us is available at the perfect time right now to help families separated by the global pandemic come together in a meaningful way. Learn more at the website:

www.gatheringus.com

Listen here:

Virtual Funerals and Memorials

This episode includes:

  • The inspiration behind GatheringUs
  • One way in which virtual funerals can be better than in-person events
  • How a virtual funeral is conducted
  • How virtual funerals lend themselves to unique and creative celebrations
  • How virtual “reception rooms” facilitate more intimate sharing during the event
  • Why virtual funerals are likely to part of traditional funerals in the future after COVID-19
  • Why commemorations for our loved ones are especially important during this time of separation
  • How online memorial pages can help families deal with grief over time
  • “Grief Soup”: How to balance personal grief with overwhelming communal grief

Links mentioned in this episode:

  • Pre-order my book: 7 Lessons for Living from the Dying
  • Interview on White Shores Podcast with Theresa Cheung
  • Interview on A Light in the Dark with Egan Orion
  • GatheringUs website
  • Join the team at Patreon.com/eolu and get access to the EOLU mug: “Mind if we talk about death?” (only Patrons can purchase it). PLUS get our new bonuses: the monthly EOL News Update, movie reviews from 2 Doctors and a Movie, and automatic access to A Year of Reading Dangerously!

If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes! Thanks again to all supporters on my page at Patreon.com/eolu, especially my newest Patron Alan Leon! Your contributions make all the difference!

End of Life, EOLPodcast

Ep. 220 What to Do When Someone Dies: How Lantern Shows the Way with Liz Eddy

kwyattmd

Learn about a new online resource for people dealing with the death of a loved one.

podcasteddy

My guest Liz Eddy is the founder of Lantern.co, an innovative online resource for navigating the stressful and painful days after the death of a loved one. She shares how she was inspired to create this site and how it benefits those in need of information and guidance with all of the decisions that must be made after a death. Learn more at the website:

www.lantern.co

Listen here:

 

This episode includes:

  • How and why Liz created Lantern
  • How one person can make a big difference in the world
  • Why a “one-stop” resource site is valuable after the death of a loved one
  • How Lantern can help people make more affordable choices after a death
  • Educational resources available on Lantern
  • How technology can help people avoid being taken advantage of by vendors
  • How people connect with Lantern during a time of need
  • The “big vision” for Lantern in the future

Links mentioned in this episode:

  • If you enjoy this content please share it with others and consider leaving a review on iTunes! Thanks again to all supporters on Patreon.com/eolu,especially my newest Patron David Stubbers, your contributions mean everything to me!

 

End of Life, EOLPodcast, Spirituality

Ep. 125 How to Have a Peaceful Death

kwyattmd

Learn some steps you can take NOW to ensure that you will be at peace when you reach the end of life.

PodcastPeacefulDeath

momThis week I’m sharing with you my reflections on what it takes to be at peace when you die. I just observed the 5th anniversary of my Mom’s death and I was inspired to create this podcast by thinking about the peace she experienced at the time of her death and how she was able to achieve that! 

Read the companion blog on this subject here.

 

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

Join A Year of Reading Dangerously and read fantastic books about death and dying all through 2018! Learn more and sign up here.

Thanks to my latest supporter on Patreon.com/eolu: Cheryl Durden! Your contribution to this podcast and to the End-of-Life University Interview Series is greatly appreciated!

FEATURE PRESENTATION:

After writing a blog this week called “Why Some People Don’t Die in Peace” I decided that I should go further and address HOW to actually be more at peace when the end of life arrives. So here are my thoughts! These are all things to start working on now in order to be at peace in the end:

PHYSICAL:

  • Plan ahead for your time of dying: What type of care do you want to receive? Where do you want to be when you die?
  • Appoint a reliable healthcare proxy to speak on your behalf
  • Create advance directives and talk about them with everyone (family, medical providers, clergy, friends, attorney)
  • Do “death-cleaning” by giving away all the things you don’t need any more
  • Think about where you will live and who will take care of you if you are unable to care for yourself. How have you provided for these possibilities
  • Make note of all of your preparations along with all of your financial and ownership information. Make sure this is accessible to family members who may need this information in the future.
  • Plan ahead for your funeral and burial

MENTAL:

  • Prepare yourself for death by reading and learning what happens at the end of life
  • Participate in a Death Cafe to have conversations about death
  • Watch films about the end of life (like “Extremis” on Netflix)
  • Attend workshops, classes, lectures in your community about death and dying

EMOTIONAL:

  • Get your emotional “house in order” by reviewing your unfinished business – who do you need to forgive? What unhealed wounds are you carrying?
  • Work on practicing forgiveness now
  • Let go of old resentments
  • Make amends for your own errors in the past

SPIRITUAL:

  • Find meaning in life, no matter how difficult the circumstances of your life
  • Learn to live every moment and find joy and love wherever you go
  • Figure out what really matters to you and make sure you are living that every day
  • Face your fear of death to help you overcome all fears in your life and live with more joy

Thanks for supporting EOLU! I appreciate your listening – if you enjoy this content please leave a review on iTunes. Tune in next week for another fascinating episode!

Until then …

Face Your Fear              BE Ready               Love Your Life

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End of Life, EOLPodcast

Ep. 78 Change Happens: How to be Prepared for the Ultimate Transition

kwyattmd

What does it take to be ready and at peace when you reach the end of life? Here are some thoughts on how to prepare.

 

podcastroadmap

In this episode we’ll take a look at what you need to do to prepare for the future, particularly the end of life. You’ll find out how to BE Ready for whatever life brings your way!

ANNOUNCEMENT:

slide01The Roadmap for End-of-Life Planning Course is finally available! Click here to learn more.

This 4-module course is like having your own personal consultation with an end-of-life physician (me!) who guides you through completing your paperwork one step at a time!

Check it out!

supportonpatreon-e1412764908776This podcast is sponsored through the EOLU donation page at Patreon.com/eolu. By contributing just $1 or $2 per month you can help support the podcast and the End-of-Life University Interview Series. If you  become a supporter I will happily promote your book, website, cause or organization on a future episode of the podcast! THANK YOU to my latest patron Sylvie and to all current patrons!!

IN THE NEWS:

  1. Facebook announces it will offer employees up to 20 days of paid bereavement leave and 6 weeks of paid leave to care for an ill loved one.
  2. A study done by U of Colorado Anschutz showed that oncologists are reluctant to have conversations with patients about their prognosis and patients seem equally unwilling to discuss the difficult facts about their diagnosis. This demonstrates the need for better preparation for the end of life BEFORE the onset of a life-limiting illness.

Change Happens: How to be Prepared for the Ultimate Transition

17153795 - are you ready illustration design over a white backgroundWhat steps should you take now to be fully prepared for later life? I like to break them down into 3 categories: Paperwork, People, and Purpose.

Here are some suggestions for your own preparations:

  1. Paperwork:
  • Make sure you have completed an estate plan and/or will to protect your financial assets
  • Appoint someone to be your financial power of attorney AND a separate  person as your medical power of attorney
  • Complete your advance directive (or living will)
  • Plan for your funeral and burial
  • Gather important documents, account numbers, passwords, etc. into on file where they will be accessible in the future (Check out the BE Ready Checklist for a list of all these documents you should gather)

2. People:

  • Tie up “loose ends” in your life by practicing forgiveness
  • Make amends with the people closest to you
  • Say “I love you” whenever you have the opportunity
  • Talk with your loved ones about your healthcare wishes
  • Talk with your doctors (and also spiritual advisor or attorney if relevant) about your end-of-life wishes
  • Be prepared to care for an ill or dying loved one at home if that should become necessary

3. Purpose:

  • Think about your own sense of meaning and purpose in life–are you living life fully in each moment?
  • Practice being present in the moment by taking up mindfulness or using deep breathing
  • Recognize that your purpose is not really something you hope to accomplish in the future; it lies in how you live your life each moment
  • Face your fear of death so that you can fully prepare and then relax and enjoy all that your life offers to you

Click here to download the End-of-Life Preparedness Assessment to see if you are ready!

Tune in every Monday for a new episode. Until the next time, remember:

Face Your Fears.                     BE Ready.                Love Your Life.

karen-signature

 

 

End of Life, EOLPodcast, Spirituality

Ep. 73 How to Die Happy! A Tribute to My Mom: Margaret Wyatt

kwyattmd

What does it take to have a smile on your face the day you die? 

podcastmom

In this episode I pay a tribute to my Mom, Margaret Wyatt, who died 4 years ago in her own home, filled with joy and love. I’ll share the lessons I learned from her death about how each one of us can “Die Happy”!

supportonpatreon-e1412764908776This podcast is sponsored through the EOLU donation page at Patreon.com/eolu. By contributing just $1 or $2 per month you can help support the podcast and the End-of-Life University Interview Series. If you  become a supporter I will happily promote your book, website, cause or organization on a future episode of the podcast!

Today I have a huge thank-you for 2 new patrons on Patreon.com/eolu:

 

  • Michelle Holmes – who has asked that I promote a favorite cause of hers: The Still Place. The Still Place is a charitable organization providing rest, renewal and re-creation to families living with serious illness in hope of fostering resiliency, empowerment and self-determination. We provide free of charge vacations, uniquely planned and lovingly facilitated for families who find it difficult if not impossible to get away, plan and experience the healing restorative properties of a family vacation. Go to their website at www.thestillplace.org to learn more!
  • Holly Pruett – who is the founder of Death Talk Project. Death Talk Project organizes workshops, rituals, Death Cafes, monthly movie nights, and other events in Portland, Oregon. Join in for useful, honest conversation about how we die, how we mourn, and how we care for and remember our dead. Holly also created the community event Death OK: Let’s Talk About It and Death Talk Project grew out of that event. Learn more at www.deathtalkproject.com.

mom

A Tribute to Margaret Wyatt

My Mom died four years today, on the day I am writing and recording this episode, and I had the privilege of being at her bedside for the last 5 days of her life. She was happy and joyful and filled with love as she took her final breaths and she inspired me to want to teach other people how to die happy too.

Mom was in very frail health for the last 5 years before she died and had become housebound as a result. She only left her home a handful of times during those years, but she received help from a friend with grocery shopping, housework and laundry.

Believing that she was going to die soon, Mom set about to plan and prepare for her own death, though she didn’t realize then that she would live for 5 more years. She created a Living Will (using Five Wishes), planned her funeral and burial (and paid for them), and gathered together all of the financial, insurance, and estate documents that she thought my brother and I might need after her death.

She also talked about her own death, her end-of-life wishes, and how she imagined her own dying process. She made sure that both my brother and I knew what she wanted at the time of her death: to be in her own home, in her own bed, with me at her side providing care. And that is exactly what happened when she died. Her wishes were fulfilled because she had thought about them, planned for them and talked about them.

Mom was happy when she died because she was ready to go. She wasn’t afraid to die and felt that she had lived a full life. There was nothing left undone in her mind and she was looking forward to leaving her tired and painful body behind when the time came. Her death was happy, peaceful and beautiful because of the way she lived her life. Here are some of the lessons I learned from her about how to die happy:

  • Believe in something bigger than yourself. Mom always devoted her time to being of service to others. In her last years of life she spent every afternoon praying for people from the comfort of her reclining chair.
  • Have a daily spiritual practice.
  • Prepare for and talk about death. As already mentioned, Mom was ready in every possible way for her own death.
  • Let go of attachments. She freed herself from some of the burden of material possessions by giving things away to her visitors for 5 years.
  • Make amends with the past and with other people.
  • Be satisfied with life just as it is.
  • Make the most of whatever you have been given.

My Mom is dearly missed but I am comforted by knowing that she was happy when she died. Her beautiful death inspired all of the work I have done in the past 4 years with End-of-Life University, Death Expo and this podcast. I’m passionate about helping everyone find a way to die happy! I wish you could have met her ….

Until next week remember:

Face Your Fears.              BE Ready.                Love Your Life.